Running today in the rain I had a moment where I was running feeling bad for myself because I was in the rain, my body hurt, my stomach felt terrible, on and on. I was running and thinking this was stupid. I was running and not enjoying what I was doing. How could this be? I have been training for this marathon for over 100 days. I have been on one heck of a journey. Despite the goal of running a marathon I have changed my habits and lifestyle. I enjoy getting out and running. It is my place of solace to not being online or being a parent, but just a nobody in the darkness running. Running and having a moment to think.
I had a decision to make on this run today. If I continued to think the way I was thinking this was not going to be a successful run. I thought back to some things I have read lately and in an instant I switched my frame of mind. This changed everything.
- I looked up at the rain and embraced the moment I was in. I started to love the rain. How often do I get a chance to run in the rain and just be a kid again. When I was a kid I wanted to be in the rain and as an adult I forgot how great it was. I remembered today.
- I thought about how lucky I am to be able to run with all the aches and pains I was running through. Nothing major, but the fact that I could be out there today running and feeling great despite some things that were not in my favor. How fortunate am I that I can do this? I reminded myself of how many people don't have this opportunity.
- I have put too many hours into my training to not have fun. Why run with negativity in my mind? I reminded myself that I did not set out on this journey to punish myself. I set out on this journey to prove something to myself, but to also have fun. I have had fun. I need to continue to have fun. I forced a smile and just ran in the puddles and mud and had fun. Why not?
- I thought about seeing my family on the race course this weekend. I hope the weather works with us so my kids and Amanda can be there to cheer me on. Just thinking of seeing them on the course gave me goosebumps and about choked me up today running. I know that sounds super cheesy, but I don't run for myself, but for them as well. As I see my son struggle with new challenges that life presents to him I hope to be that role model that lets him know that when I say he can do what he sets his mind to that he sees that I am living by my words.