I ran two times last week. Both times I was so happy that I did run, but it was not enough to get me back in my groove.
I have been in a funk since the Pigman Long Triathlon on August 19th. I took one week off after that race because I felt the need to give my body a serious rest. I could feel my motivation starting to fall off a bit the last few weeks leading up to that race, but I held on and race quite well.
The week after the race I ran one time for 4 miles. I was not too sore after the race, but my legs were tired and my mind just went right out the window. The same thing happened to me last year after training for the marathon. I lost all drive to keep training or exercising.
Last week I really felt like I would get back in the swing of things.
It did not happen.
I ran twice. Tuesday and Thursday. Thursday I ran with Jay out in the cross country course in the dark. It was a great run. I loved it. Something different and a change of pace.
It still did not help get me going.
I have done nothing since.
Here is the catch. I feel like a turd. Really, a big fat one. I don't feel good about myself. My eating habits have completely hit a knew time high of nasty. I feel like I have juts become a fat blob. I need to change. I want to change. But, it is just not happening.
The catch is that I still have the marathon in my sights despite being three weeks away. If I am to do this race it needs to start tomorrow. I must get some solid training in to even see if 26 miles is possible. Two week off is long, but not the end of all training.
I have laid out a plan. I hope to complete it. We shall see. If not, then I guess I just sit tight until something clicks much like things did this year when I wanted to do a 70.3 triathlon distance without ever doing a single tri. Much like last year when I wanted to run a marathon. Much like the year before when I started running for the first time and ran a half. Something will connect, but just not sure when.
I need something to strive for. Something to motivate. Something will happen. I just hope it is soon...like tomorrow!