Why I HATE my dogs

Many who know me understand that I cannot my two cocker spaniels. They are both worthless(however, they are not neglected or treated poorly by any means). I come home from work on Tuesday to my house in a mess. Our dogs have to be put in our storage room when we leave the house because they poop and pee everywhere in addition to getting in the garbage and destroying anything that they feel like. We used to just shut the door to our storage, but then they figured out that if they rammed their heads hard enough into the door that it would open up. So our next step was to place a wire around the door handle and secure that to our stair guard rail. We have had no problems with this method until today. I walk into my home and right away I see 3 boxes of Cracker Jacks on my living room floor and a bag of M & M's and two dogs barking like crazy. I put them outside because I know I am ready to blow. Instantly I walk to my daughters bedroom as this is the place they always go to destroy anything. There is another box of CJ in the upstairs hallway and in her room there is another bag of M & M's(unopened) and four boxes of CJ that have been completely destroyed(I know 4 because they left the prizes untouched). Now you may be thinking no big deal. However, my box that contained my package of 24 CJ was in my office in my basement. They dragged those darn things all over my house.

Naturally, I have to go to the basement as I am fuming at this point. I go downstairs and find this destruction to my door.
Can you believe this? My door is ruined. I look around and they play card games also as UNO has been chewed on and appears to be played a few times. What better than to come home to a ruined house where instead of peace and quiet I become furious cleaning up after two stupid dogs who have destroyed my house and pooped on my floor. I hate my dogs.